“Ask a Priest: Is the ‘Five Wishes’ OK for End-of-Life Decisions?”

Regnum Christi Spirituality Center Ask a Priest
Q: I will soon be 70 and in bad health. I need to know if I do the Five Wishes, by giving my daughter the power to allow me to die, like a living will? Is it considered a mortal sin? I don’t want her to have to pay for care, while watching me slowly die. I appreciate an honest answer and not just one to put me at ease. My soul is important — it is the only one I have. – J.R.

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC

A: It is certainly good that you are focused on guarding your soul. Though the end of life can be difficult, it can also be a grace in that it gives us time to prepare to meet Our Lord.

However, living wills, especially the Five Wishes type, can be morally problematic.

The Five Wishes, in broad outline, are: 1) the person I want to make health-care decisions for me when I can’t; 2) the kind of medical treatment I want or don’t want; 3) how comfortable I want to be; 4) how I want people to treat me; and 5) what I want my loved ones to know.

The Five Wishes might have a certain appeal on first glance. But they can oversimplify things, and they imply that certain kinds of suffering render a life not worth living. This is not a Christian attitude.

The better route is that a patient and the person who might make decisions about the patient understand Catholic teaching on end-of-life issues. They might need to consult a Catholic bioethics expert in certain cases.

Certain principles need to be followed. For instance, there are times when treatment can be licitly withheld, but things such as hydration and basic nutrition must be given as long as a person can accept them.

The Catechism in No. 2278 says, “Discontinuing medical procedures that are burdensome, dangerous, extraordinary, or disproportionate to the expected outcome can be legitimate; it is the refusal of ‘over-zealous’ treatment. Here one does not will to cause death; one’s inability to impede it is merely accepted. The decisions should be made by the patient if he is competent and able or, if not, by those legally entitled to act for the patient, whose reasonable will and legitimate interests must always be respected.”

For more reading about living wills, see the posting on “Should I Have a Living Will?”

Other helpful reading in line with Catholic principles can be this guide on end-of-life decisions and an article on a revision of a health-care directive. I hope some of this helps.

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Alex Kucera

Atlanta

Alex Kucera has lived in Atlanta, GA, for the last 46 years. He is one of 9 children, married to his wife Karmen, and has 3 girls, one grandson, and a granddaughter on the way. Alex joined Regnum Christi in 2007. Out of the gate, he joined the Helping Hands Medical Missions apostolate and is still participating today with the Ghana Friendship Mission.

In 2009, Alex was asked to be the Atlanta RC Renewal Coordinator for the Atlanta Locality to help the RC members with the RC renewal process. Alex became a Group Leader in 2012 for four of the Atlanta Men’s Section Teams and continues today. Running in parallel, in 2013, Alex became a Team Leader and shepherded a large team of good men.

Alex was honored to be the Atlanta Mission Coordinator between 2010 to 2022 (12 years), coordinating 5-8 Holy Week Mission teams across Georgia. He also created and coordinated missions at a parish in Athens, GA, for 9 years. Alex continues to coordinate Holy Week Missions, Advent Missions, and Monthly missions at Good Shepherd Catholic Church in Cumming, GA.

From 2016 to 2022, Alex also served as the Men’s Section Assistant in Atlanta. He loved working with the Men’s Section Director, the Legionaries, Consecrated, and Women’s Section leadership teams.

Alex is exceptionally grateful to the Legionaries, Consecrated, and many RC members who he’s journeyed shoulder to shoulder, growing his relationship with Christ and others along the way. He knows that there is only one way, that’s Christ’s Way, with others!