December 20, 2024

Q: I grew up as a Christian but frequently have doubts about God. Whenever I ask my family or friends about my doubts, they would tell me to read the Bible and pray more and cast away my doubts as they are from the devil. I have read the Bible from Genesis to Revelation and go to church weekly since I was young, only to realize that I will never be able to fulfill all the criteria to get to heaven. Even if everyone says Jesus had died for our sins, I still consider myself unworthy of eternal life. And seeing the prevalence of hypocritical Christians doesn’t help. As a child I worshipped God because I was scared of hell. And even until now I am afraid of the unknown after death. Why did God even bother to create us? Why did he put the tree in the Garden of Eden, knowing that it was just a matter of time before the two humans succumbed to their curiosity and temptation? I really want to stick to my believe in God, but knowing full well I belong in hell after death doesn’t help my faith. I genuinely don’t know what to do. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. — Anita

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC

A: It sounds as though you grew up in a Protestant denomination — hence the advice to read the Bible when doubts arose.

While the Bible is the inspired word of God, it’s not always easy to understand. And it’s certainly not meant as a simple handbook of moral living. It’s much more complex than that.

So don’t be surprised that you can’t find easy answers to all your questions by simply opening Scripture.

But first things first.

You say that you consider yourself unworthy of eternal life. Welcome to the club. For none of us is worthy of heaven on our own merits.

The Gospels say as much. “When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and said, ‘Who then can be saved?’ Jesus looked at them and said, ‘For human beings this is impossible, but for God all things are possible’” (Matthew 19:25-26).

The point here is that salvation is a gift of God. We can’t earn our way into heaven. God wants to give us heaven, but we need to humbly admit our sinfulness and repent and open ourselves to his grace.

As for hypocritical Christians: Don’t get too distracted by them. The devil likes to use the shortcomings of others to get us to take our eyes off Jesus.

As for your fear of hell: Some degree of fear can be healthy and realistic. Jesus told us as much. “I shall show you whom to fear. Be afraid of the one who after killing has the power to cast into Gehenna; yes, I tell you, be afraid of that one” (Luke 12:5).

But the fear of hell shouldn’t be our sole focus. Fear has a way of wearing us down. Jesus came to lift us up. His core message was about the need for repentance and love of God and neighbor, not fear.

For God created us out of love. He created us with the idea that we would share eternal bliss with him someday in heaven.

He wants us to freely love him, which is why he gives us free will. He didn’t create us as robots.

He gave Adam and Eve free will, and they misused it. They rebelled against him by sinning. They caused a rupture in the universe and in human nature itself. It’s a bit mysterious, but we inherited a damaged human nature from them. This is what we call original sin.

Original sin has three main effects. It darkens our intellect, weakens our will, and distorts our passions. This is why we wrestle with concupiscence, the tendency to sin.

God didn’t give up on us. In fact, he loves us so much that he sent only Son to redeem us by his death on a cross. This is a God we can trust.

So why did he create us when he foresaw that many would reject him? Probably because he thought it was still worth it for the sake of those who would embrace him.

Now, all of this might seem a bit complicated. But it does all fit together. It might help you to get an overview of the Catholic faith.

A few resources that might help you include the Youth Catechism, the Compendium of the Catechism, and the U.S. Catholic Catechism for Adults.

Other helpful resources include Catholic Answers and Ascension Presents.

In any case, keep focused on Jesus and be confident in God’s love for you, his beloved daughter. Count on my prayers.