July 12, 2024

Regnum Christi Spirituality Center Ask a Priest

“Ask a Priest: Is It a Sin to Joke at Others’ Expense?”

Q: I like to make people laugh. Whether it be my family and friends or people I don’t know, I’ve always enjoyed making people smile. I’ve been getting more into my faith and have begun to look at my attempts at humor in a different light. Sometimes when I crack jokes, it can be at the expense of others. While I don’t intend to do any harm and it’s often understood that I don’t, I am now wondering if this is a sin. I don’t think my jokes cause any harm to the person I’m joking about, but I am wondering if I should go to confession as I didn’t know this could be a mortal sin. I tend to be a little overly scrupulous so I might be overthinking this but any insight would be appreciated. – Ben

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC

A: If you are asking these questions, your conscience might be nudging you to reconsider these jokes.

You say you getting more into your faith. That’s good. And that might be precisely why you are viewing the jokes in a different light.

It might be good to follow your conscience. You mention that you don’t think the jokes constitute a mortal sin and thus you don’t need to go to confession. Fair enough.

But ask yourself another question: If these jokes were “only” a venial sin, would you keep cracking them?

Remember, we aren’t here just to avoid mortal sin. We are here to become saints.

So instead of asking, “Is this a mortal sin?”, it might be better to ask, “How can I use all my words for the glory of God?”

This isn’t to imply that all joking is forbidden. In certain circles, telling jokes about others is actually a way of showing appreciation for them.

But this would need to done with prudence, for an ill-timed or indiscreet joke can leave a deep wound.

And let’s not forget the words of Jesus in Matthew 12:26 — “On the day of judgment people will render an account for every careless word they speak.”

 

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Regnum Christi Spirituality Center Uncle Eddy

St John Gualbert

Dear Al,

I can’t tell you how delighted I was to receive your latest email.  I was a little bit worried that working all summer for the Department of Forestry might prove a little wearisome, a little boring for you, considering your penchant for mental activity.  I am glad that your mind (and heart) has found your work and environment useful for contemplation.  Somehow, your experience of “God amongst the trees” as you put it so poetically (though other eyes might have misinterpreted such a phrase) reminds me of today’s saint, who happens to be the patron saint of forest workers and foresters, park services, and parks.

John was a Florentine nobleman who thoroughly enjoyed his sumptuous aristocratic privileges, of which he took maximum advantage.  Besides pleasure, his one passion as a young man was revenge.  His brother Hugh had been murdered, and John felt it was his duty of justice and honor to put the killer to death.  He searched for the culprit, to no avail, and continued nursing his ire.

One Good Friday as he was returning to Florence from a short journey, he was making his way through a narrow pass when his prey entered the same pass from the other side.  There was no way of escape.  John, grateful to finally have an opportunity to do his duty, drew his sword and prepared to avenge his brother’s death.  But the killer cast himself on his knees and begged for mercy.  At that moment, his sword poised to do justice, the thought of Christ on the cross, forgiving his enemies, came to his mind.  He couldn’t bring himself to execute his long-contemplated plan.  Instead he embraced his enemy, forgave him, and spared him.

Soon afterwards, John had a vision of Christ on the Cross bowing to him, as if acknowledging the righteousness of his action.  Entering Florence, he stopped at the ancient church of San Miniato al Monte to pray before the crucifix there.  It was a moment of grace, and he felt his call to join the monastic community that took care of the church.  His family was up in arms about the idea, but they couldn’t stop him, and he took the habit.  Later he would leave that community and form his own monastery (still operating today in Vallombrosa, near Fiesole on the outskirts of Florence) as part of the European movement of monastic reform.  He attracted many followers, who ended up founding another half dozen monasteries during his lifetime.  He also attracted bishops and popes, who came to him for advice and guidance (it was said he had the gift of prophecy).  He was a light of truth and grace in a difficult time for the Church and society in general.

So why is he the patron saint of parks and foresters?  The area surrounding his monastery at Vallombrosa was wild and deserted when he first arrived.  John thought that it would be more conducive to contemplation and discipline if the grounds were better kept.  But instead of a traditional garden, he opted to have his monks plant trees (firs and pines mostly), creating a park and nature preserve to enhance the prayerful environment.

And judging from your own experience, I would say that you have learned the same lesson – at least about the real purpose of nature’s wonders and beauties.  I pray you also learn the other lesson – about forgiveness and charity, which are as refreshing to the soul as a walk in the forest is to the body.

Your loving uncle,

Eddy

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Alex Kucera

Atlanta

Alex Kucera has lived in Atlanta, GA, for the last 46 years. He is one of 9 children, married to his wife Karmen, and has 3 girls, one grandson, and a granddaughter on the way. Alex joined Regnum Christi in 2007. Out of the gate, he joined the Helping Hands Medical Missions apostolate and is still participating today with the Ghana Friendship Mission.

In 2009, Alex was asked to be the Atlanta RC Renewal Coordinator for the Atlanta Locality to help the RC members with the RC renewal process. Alex became a Group Leader in 2012 for four of the Atlanta Men’s Section Teams and continues today. Running in parallel, in 2013, Alex became a Team Leader and shepherded a large team of good men.

Alex was honored to be the Atlanta Mission Coordinator between 2010 to 2022 (12 years), coordinating 5-8 Holy Week Mission teams across Georgia. He also created and coordinated missions at a parish in Athens, GA, for 9 years. Alex continues to coordinate Holy Week Missions, Advent Missions, and Monthly missions at Good Shepherd Catholic Church in Cumming, GA.

From 2016 to 2022, Alex also served as the Men’s Section Assistant in Atlanta. He loved working with the Men’s Section Director, the Legionaries, Consecrated, and Women’s Section leadership teams.

Alex is exceptionally grateful to the Legionaries, Consecrated, and many RC members who he’s journeyed shoulder to shoulder, growing his relationship with Christ and others along the way. He knows that there is only one way, that’s Christ’s Way, with others!