“Ask a Priest: Why Do the Wayward Seem to Have It So Easy?”
Q: Why does God keep pouring blessings on the ungodly and withhold or remove his blessing from those of us who take him seriously? I have two older cousins. One is an atheist who enjoyed the “spirit of the age,” went through multiple marriages and left the Church, and God has blessed her with nearly a dozen grandchildren. The other cousin, who walked the straight and narrow and resisted all attempts to lure her from the Church, has children who are in their 40s, all unmarried, with no kids. In my own case, I strove to raise my children in the Church. One is an angry atheist, and two others are mired in LGBT. I watch my peers who made no effort at religious education, and they have happy, well-adjusted children. (No, I and my husband weren’t weird or secretly abusive.) How can I evangelize my friends and family when they look at my empty life, and theirs are full? How am I supposed to convince them that Jesus will make their lives better? – M.J.
Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC
A: I’m sorry to hear about your children and relatives who have strayed from the faith.
One of the mysteries of life is that there isn’t a strict correlation between one’s faith and the rewards that one might expect to see in this world.
In fact, Jesus didn’t promise us an easy life. He promised us the cross.
It might be good to remember the parable of Lazarus and the rich man (Luke 16:19-31).
The rich man has a cushy life but ended up in hell.
Lazarus, on the other hand, had a very hard life but ended up in the bosom of Abraham.
In the Christian life we are called to be faithful, not successful. Jesus was faithful—and ended up on a cross. The Blessed Virgin was faithful—and ended up having to watch her Son die a horrible death.
Try not to judge the quality of your life by worldly standards. Things will look very different once we step into eternity.
As to your question about evangelization: It’s good to remember that evangelization isn’t so much about convincing people to convert. Conversion is ultimately a work of the Holy Spirit.
What you can do is try to live your faith as best you can, to pray and sacrifice for others, and to share at opportune moments how the faith has helped you.
Recall the parable of the sower and the seeds (Luke 8:5-8). He sowed seeds but wouldn’t have immediately seen the fruits of the seeds that fell on rich soil.
Perhaps you are called to sow seeds as best you can. The Holy Spirit can complete the work in his own time.
And who knows? Your fidelity and perseverance in faith and prayer, amid so many disappointments, might be the very things that merit the grace of conversion for some of your wayward relatives and peers.
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He saw it all.