{"id":186498,"date":"2026-01-27T00:01:12","date_gmt":"2026-01-27T05:01:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/?p=186498&preview=true&preview_id=186498"},"modified":"2025-12-18T17:18:39","modified_gmt":"2025-12-18T22:18:39","slug":"ask-a-priest-what-if-i-dont-want-to-remarry-or-be-alone","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-i-dont-want-to-remarry-or-be-alone\/","title":{"rendered":"Ask a Priest: “What If I Don\u2019t Want to Remarry or Be Alone?”"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Q: I got married very young, was not ready, and the marriage ended in divorce and annulment. When I was 31, I found the perfect person for me and remarried. In her late 50s, she died. What plans does God have when he allows a partner to die when marriage is supposed to be a lifelong partnership? I understand that I am free to remarry. However, I will never find someone like my wife, and I’m not really excited about the idea of remarrying in my 60s. Other people have stated that “Maybe God wants you to be alone now,” but it was God who said in Genesis 2:18 that it is not good for man to be alone. I’m confused and honestly don’t want to remarry or be alone. \u2013 S<\/address><\/blockquote>\n

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC<\/em>:<\/p>\n

None of us wants to be alone. As humans, we are made for relationships of one kind or another. So, your desire to avoid loneliness is natural.<\/p>\n

As you say, marriage is a lifelong partnership. This means it lasts as long as both spouses are living. When a spouse dies, the marriage is over.<\/p>\n

If you don’t want to remarry or be alone, then you should build other kinds of relationships.<\/p>\n

The most important relationship is the one with God. Think of dedicating yourself to an intense life of prayer and sacraments, including daily Mass. You can offer up your Masses for your deceased wife.<\/p>\n

And think of volunteering at the parish or other places to help the poor and marginalized.<\/p>\n

By helping others and networking with other volunteers, your sense of loneliness might lessen.<\/p>\n

As for Genesis 2:18: Like any biblical verse, it needs to be read within the whole context of Scripture. It doesn\u2019t imply that everyone must marry. Jesus lived a celibate life.<\/p>\n

Also, keep in mind that this side of heaven we will never find perfect happiness. We are pilgrims in an imperfect world. All that we see around us is passing. So, we want to stay focused on the only One who can give us eternal happiness.<\/p>\n

Count on my prayers. <\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Q: I got married very young, was not ready, and the marriage ended in divorce and annulment. When I was 31, I found the perfect person for me and remarried. 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Edward McIlmail, LC","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","caption":"Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC"},"description":"Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC, ordained to the priesthood in 2001, taught theology and Scripture at the then Mater Ecclesiae College in Rhode Island and is now a part-time chaplain at Overbrook Academy in Greenville, R.I. He holds degrees from Holy Apostles College and Seminary in Connecticut, the Regina Apostolorum Athenaeum in Rome, and Northwestern University in Illinois. He was an assistant publisher of the National Catholic Register and Faith & Family magazine and an editor of the Zenit news agency\u2019s English edition. He has written for\u00a0SpiritualDirection.com\u00a0and\u00a0ePriest. Fr. McIlmail also worked in spiritual retreats in the Northeast, New England, the Midwest, and the South\u00a0and assisted with mission work in Mexico. Born in Philadelphia, he worked in journalism and was active in the pro-life movement before entering the novitiate of the Legion of Christ in 1992. His contributions to RCSpirituality include responding to\u00a0Ask A Priest\u00a0questions and sharing his insights in our\u00a0Weekly Newsletter.","url":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/author\/emcilmail\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/186498","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/362"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=186498"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/186498\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/157773"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=186498"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=186498"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=186498"},{"taxonomy":"post_folder","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_folder?post=186498"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}