{"id":153341,"date":"2021-09-21T09:30:59","date_gmt":"2021-09-21T13:30:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-a-prison-guard-feels-hatred-toward-offenders\/"},"modified":"2024-10-22T15:02:58","modified_gmt":"2024-10-22T19:02:58","slug":"ask-a-priest-what-if-a-prison-guard-feels-hatred-toward-offenders","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-a-prison-guard-feels-hatred-toward-offenders\/","title":{"rendered":"“Ask a Priest: What If a Prison Guard Feels Hatred Toward Offenders?”"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
Q: My son, born and raised Catholic, is employed as a guard at a local prison. He is struggling with his belief that in order to go to heaven, one cannot judge others, etc., and the fact that he literally protects child molesters. He feels great hatred for these men and can’t reconcile this feeling with his faith. He is a good man, but he feels he is doomed to hell because of his feelings toward these men. Can you help me to help him? \u2013 D.<\/address>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC<\/em><\/p>\n

A:\u00a0It is understandable that the crime of child molestation stokes deep feelings of revulsion in people. It is a despicable act. The thought of innocent children being abused is sickening.<\/p>\n

Notwithstanding the horror of these acts, and in light of what we know of God\u2019s mercy, it might help to remind your son that Jesus suffered and died even for those molesters.<\/p>\n

God loves all of us, despite our failings and at times terrible sins. His desire is that we all make it to heaven today.<\/p>\n

In this sense, your son might see his work as giving time for the molesters to experience a conversion if they haven’t done so yet. Recall what Jesus said finding the lost sheep (see Luke 15:7).<\/p>\n

Also, his work as a prison guard is helping to maintain a justice system that, despite its imperfections, still manages to function. Without law and order, this country would become a jungle. So, his work fulfills an honorable purpose.<\/p>\n

It might be good to remind him, moreover, that molesters themselves often suffered abuse as children. This isn’t an excuse for their behavior, but it helps to put things in context.<\/p>\n

Maybe a more compelling reason for forgiveness is this: Christ invites us to forgive because, in part, he knows what a spirit of unforgiveness can do to us. The crime of these molesters can corrupt your son if he nurtures hate toward them.<\/p>\n

Jesus is inviting your son to let go of this hatred, and to commend souls to God. \u201cBlessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy\u201d (Matthew 5:7).<\/p>\n

Perhaps it can help your son to realize that forgiveness is an act of the will; it is not about feelings. Your son might not have warm feelings toward these convicts, and he might never have them. Yet, he can make an act of forgiveness, wishing that these inmates have a conversion of heart and reach heaven someday.<\/p>\n

Your son might find guidance in Pope Francis\u2019 encyclical Fratelli Tutti<\/em><\/a>,<\/em> \u201cForgiving does not mean forgetting. \u2026 In the face of an action that can never be tolerated, justified or excused, we can still forgive. In the face of something that cannot be forgotten for any reason, we can still forgive\u201d (No. 250).<\/p>\n

If convicts need to stay in jail for life in order to protect others, so be it. Forgiveness of their\u00a0sin doesn’t mean letting them off the hook. They have a price to pay for their deeds. Your son\u2019s work helps ensure that they pay that price \u2013 and gives them time for repentance.<\/p>\n

It might be good to intensify your prayers for your son.<\/p>\n

I hope some of this helps. Count on my prayers.<\/p>\n

Keep learning more with <\/span>Ask a Priest<\/a><\/p>\n

Got a question? Need an answer?<\/h3>\n

Today\u2019s secular world throws curve balls at us all the time. AskACatholicPriest is a Q&A feature that anyone can use. Just type your question HERE<\/a>\u00a0and you will get a personal response back from one of our priests at RCSpirituality. You can ask about anything \u2013 liturgy, prayer, moral questions, current events\u2026 Our goal is simply to provide a trustworthy forum for dependable Catholic guidance and information. So go ahead and ask your question\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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Edward McIlmail, LC","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","caption":"Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC"},"description":"Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC, ordained to the priesthood in 2001, taught theology and Scripture at the then Mater Ecclesiae College in Rhode Island and is now a part-time chaplain at Overbrook Academy in Greenville, R.I. He holds degrees from Holy Apostles College and Seminary in Connecticut, the Regina Apostolorum Athenaeum in Rome, and Northwestern University in Illinois. He was an assistant publisher of the National Catholic Register and Faith & Family magazine and an editor of the Zenit news agency\u2019s English edition. He has written for\u00a0SpiritualDirection.com\u00a0and\u00a0ePriest. Fr. McIlmail also worked in spiritual retreats in the Northeast, New England, the Midwest, and the South\u00a0and assisted with mission work in Mexico. Born in Philadelphia, he worked in journalism and was active in the pro-life movement before entering the novitiate of the Legion of Christ in 1992. His contributions to RCSpirituality include responding to\u00a0Ask A Priest\u00a0questions and sharing his insights in our\u00a0Weekly Newsletter.","url":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/author\/emcilmail\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/153341","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/362"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=153341"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/153341\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/145952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=153341"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=153341"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=153341"},{"taxonomy":"post_folder","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_folder?post=153341"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}