{"id":153241,"date":"2021-07-06T09:30:08","date_gmt":"2021-07-06T13:30:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-how-can-i-learn-to-treat-my-parents-better\/"},"modified":"2024-10-22T15:03:22","modified_gmt":"2024-10-22T19:03:22","slug":"ask-a-priest-how-can-i-learn-to-treat-my-parents-better","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-how-can-i-learn-to-treat-my-parents-better\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;Ask a Priest: How Can I Learn to Treat My Parents Better?&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote>\n<address>Q: I am 16 and I struggle with the idea of &#8220;honoring thy father and thy mother.&#8221; What happens is, something happens and I get mad at them in the heat of the moment and typically end up saying something mean about them behind their back. And then two minutes later I regret saying something mean about them. I know this isn&#8217;t a good thing and I would like to stop. Is there anything you could help me with to think before I speak and not say something mean, as I know it is a sin. \u2013 E.<\/address>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><em>Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC<\/em><\/p>\n<p>A:\u00a0If you struggle with something, that means it is an opportunity for you to grow and to master your passions.<\/p>\n<p>As you mention, you respond impulsively and then regret it minutes later. That is a sure sign that you want to focus on the problem here: It&#8217;s not your parents but rather you and your emotions.<\/p>\n<p>You might want to give priority to learning to manage your emotions. Adulthood requires that we are in control of ourselves.<\/p>\n<p>When it comes to honoring one&#8217;s parents, there is much more involved than just managing one&#8217;s emotions.<\/p>\n<p>It helps to cultivate a deep spirit of gratitude toward them and for everything they have done for you. They brought you into the world, took care of you when you were in diapers, made sure you were fed and housed and protected. They loved you from the time you were in the womb. They are special conduits of God&#8217;s love. You owe them a lot.<\/p>\n<p>It might help to recall, too, that a lot of your contemporaries don&#8217;t even have parents or stable families. What you have is no small gift from God.<\/p>\n<p>To cultivate respect for your parents, it might help to cultivate a day-to-day spirit of charity. Thank them for the little things and big things they do for you. Actively look to help them &#8212; don&#8217;t wait for them to have to ask you to do things. And be sure to pray for them daily.<\/p>\n<p>All this is remote preparation for learning to curb your fiery side.<\/p>\n<p>A real man looks out for others. You want to be that kind of man, right?<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"color: #000000; font-size: 1.125rem;\">Keep learning more with <\/span><a style=\"font-size: 1.125rem;\" href=\"https:\/\/rcspiritual.wpenginepowered.com\/ask-a-priest\/\">Ask a Priest<\/a><\/p>\n<h3>Got a question? Need an answer?<\/h3>\n<p>Today\u2019s secular world throws curve balls at us all the time. AskACatholicPriest is a Q&amp;A feature that anyone can use. Just type your question <a href=\"https:\/\/rcspiritual.wpenginepowered.com\/ask-a-priest-question\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">HERE<\/a>\u00a0and you will get a personal response back from one of our priests at RCSpirituality. You can ask about anything \u2013 liturgy, prayer, moral questions, current events\u2026 Our goal is simply to provide a trustworthy forum for dependable Catholic guidance and information. So go ahead and ask your question\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Q: I am 16 and I struggle with the idea of &#8220;honoring thy father and thy mother.&#8221; What happens is, something happens and I get mad at them in the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":362,"featured_media":145952,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[3718],"tags":[5392,5393,3062,5394,5395,3071],"post_folder":[],"class_list":["post-153241","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-ask-a-priest","tag-emotions","tag-honor","tag-love","tag-manage","tag-mcilmail","tag-parents"],"pp_statuses_selecting_workflow":false,"pp_workflow_action":"current","pp_status_selection":"","pp_force_visibility":null,"pp_subpost_visibility":null,"pp_inherited_force_visibility":null,"pp_inherited_subpost_visibility":null,"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v28.8 (Yoast SEO v28.8) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>&quot;Ask a Priest: How Can I Learn to Treat My Parents Better?&quot; 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Edward McIlmail, LC","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","caption":"Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC"},"description":"Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC, ordained to the priesthood in 2001, taught theology and Scripture at the then Mater Ecclesiae College in Rhode Island and is now a part-time chaplain at Overbrook Academy in Greenville, R.I. He holds degrees from Holy Apostles College and Seminary in Connecticut, the Regina Apostolorum Athenaeum in Rome, and Northwestern University in Illinois. He was an assistant publisher of the National Catholic Register and Faith &amp; Family magazine and an editor of the Zenit news agency\u2019s English edition. He has written for\u00a0SpiritualDirection.com\u00a0and\u00a0ePriest. Fr. McIlmail also worked in spiritual retreats in the Northeast, New England, the Midwest, and the South\u00a0and assisted with mission work in Mexico. Born in Philadelphia, he worked in journalism and was active in the pro-life movement before entering the novitiate of the Legion of Christ in 1992. His contributions to RCSpirituality include responding to\u00a0Ask A Priest\u00a0questions and sharing his insights in our\u00a0Weekly Newsletter.","url":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/author\/emcilmail\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/153241","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/362"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=153241"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/153241\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/145952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=153241"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=153241"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=153241"},{"taxonomy":"post_folder","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_folder?post=153241"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}