{"id":153086,"date":"2019-04-23T09:30:36","date_gmt":"2019-04-23T13:30:36","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-a-fine-young-woman-now-shows-a-crude-side\/"},"modified":"2024-10-22T15:09:55","modified_gmt":"2024-10-22T19:09:55","slug":"ask-a-priest-what-if-a-fine-young-woman-now-shows-a-crude-side","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-a-fine-young-woman-now-shows-a-crude-side\/","title":{"rendered":"“Ask a Priest: What If a Fine Young Woman Now Shows a Crude Side?”"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
Q: I am 20 years old, and last year through YouTube I saw an 18-year-old girl who was featured in part of a channel where they show the rural life of Middle America. They talk about God and help others in need, etc. Nothing is scripted, and they show the raw reality of how people are there. Throughout this year I\u2019ve seen more about this girl and her family. She is wonderful because she is humble, kind, simple, modest and grateful. She is very close to her family, talks wonderfully about God, and has a very strong faith. I believe she is part of her church somehow (not sure). I got to talk to her a few months back and everything went well. However, recently I\u2019ve seen her “like” a few very vulgar “memes” on Facebook, and most recently one that takes the name of the Lord in vain. I don\u2019t like that. I was planning a trip there to meet her but also to see my family. But now I don\u2019t know if I should just give up on her, or should I keep pursuing her? Even though I feel something very strong for her, God is my priority now.\u00a0\u2013 F.<\/address>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC<\/em><\/p>\n

A:\u00a0Given the nature of social media, it isn’t easy to get a real handle on people.<\/p>\n

You have seen two sides of this young woman via Internet. Which is her “real” side? Perhaps both are. We are complex beings, after all.<\/p>\n

Perhaps those good qualities you have noticed in her are real. It\u2019s just that they are mixed in with elements that are less than perfect. Given the seedy media content that has flooded the culture, it is understandable that even goodhearted people can get accustomed to and accept vulgar or even irreverent material.<\/p>\n

What is often needed is a bit of education and better formation of a person\u2019s conscience.<\/p>\n

Rather than try to offer an assessment of this young woman — which isn’t the place of Ask of Priest — I would suggest that you give her the benefit of the doubt for now.<\/p>\n

If you want to pursue a true relationship, you will want to have face-to-face meetings with her.<\/p>\n

Your initial impressions of her were elevated and perhaps fragile. You might have been quick to project your own hopes and ideals on her. Then those hopes were quickly deflated by the meme and the misuse of Our Lord’s name. Either way, you now want to establish things on firmer ground and not on the roiling waves of social media.<\/p>\n

You mention that God is your priority now. God should always be your priority. By keeping him first your life, you might play a part in helping this young woman to live her Christian faith in a deeper way.<\/p>\n

She is probably a work in progress, like the rest of us. And if she is as humble and simple as your first suspected, she could be a potential saint. All this is something to take to prayer.<\/p>\n

Keep learning more with Ask a Priest<\/a><\/h3>\n

Got a question? Need an answer?<\/h3>\n

Today\u2019s secular world throws curve balls at us all the time. AskACatholicPriest is a Q&A feature that anyone can use. Just type in your question or send an email to AskAPriest@rcspiritual.wpenginepowered.com<\/a> and you will get a personal response back from one of our priests at RCSpirituality. You can ask about anything \u2013 liturgy, prayer, moral questions, current events\u2026 Our goal is simply to provide a trustworthy forum for dependable Catholic guidance and information. So go ahead and ask your question\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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Edward McIlmail, LC","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/485147bd811c2a8642adf1f1806f85f0adef2b00ef8ccabc9b46f8420af19e16?s=96&d=blank&r=g","caption":"Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC"},"description":"Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC, ordained to the priesthood in 2001, taught theology and Scripture at the then Mater Ecclesiae College in Rhode Island and is now a part-time chaplain at Overbrook Academy in Greenville, R.I. He holds degrees from Holy Apostles College and Seminary in Connecticut, the Regina Apostolorum Athenaeum in Rome, and Northwestern University in Illinois. He was an assistant publisher of the National Catholic Register and Faith & Family magazine and an editor of the Zenit news agency\u2019s English edition. He has written for\u00a0SpiritualDirection.com\u00a0and\u00a0ePriest. Fr. McIlmail also worked in spiritual retreats in the Northeast, New England, the Midwest, and the South\u00a0and assisted with mission work in Mexico. Born in Philadelphia, he worked in journalism and was active in the pro-life movement before entering the novitiate of the Legion of Christ in 1992. His contributions to RCSpirituality include responding to\u00a0Ask A Priest\u00a0questions and sharing his insights in our\u00a0Weekly Newsletter.","url":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/author\/emcilmail\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/153086","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/362"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=153086"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/153086\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/145952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=153086"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=153086"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=153086"},{"taxonomy":"post_folder","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_folder?post=153086"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}