{"id":153069,"date":"2019-02-22T10:30:53","date_gmt":"2019-02-22T15:30:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-i-think-a-priest-has-feelings-for-me\/"},"modified":"2024-10-22T15:10:13","modified_gmt":"2024-10-22T19:10:13","slug":"ask-a-priest-what-if-i-think-a-priest-has-feelings-for-me","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-i-think-a-priest-has-feelings-for-me\/","title":{"rendered":"“Ask a Priest: What If I Think a Priest Has Feelings for Me?”"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
Q:\u00a0I’m a 19-year-old girl, raised by a single mom and I have two younger siblings. We have always had a relationship with our parish priest as a family — I guess because we needed spiritual support. Currently our priest friend has developed some sort of feelings for me. Part of me wants to cease contact, and a part of me wants to keep touch but keep it casual as always, because he has been there for us. Even personally he has encouraged me to be better because I have been battling severe depression. I don’t want to be a distraction or cause him to break his vows, and I can’t tell my mom. She would be disappointed. \u2013 M.<\/address>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC<\/em><\/p>\n

A:\u00a0My sympathies go out to you and your family. It must be very difficult to be in a home without a dad.<\/p>\n

If you think the priest is developing feelings for you, it would be good to keep a healthy distance from him. Even if you are misinterpreting the situation, it is better to trust your instincts and to err on the side of caution.<\/p>\n

He is probably a good man. He obviously has been there to help your family. But he is also human. And so he can be tempted. It isn’t hard to see how your home situation \u2013 without a father present \u2013 could stir the heart of a parish priest in a deep but inopportune way.<\/p>\n

Perhaps the best route, the most practical route, is to remain polite with him, but to consciously limit your contact from him. If need be, you might find reasons for avoiding him, either at the parish or if he visits your home.<\/p>\n

This slight change in your behavior might even help the priest recognize and address what is happening in his own heart. He might eventually get to a better place, where things can get back to normal and you no longer feel those uncomfortable vibes from him.<\/p>\n

You might want to pray for him, too. And realize that your keeping distance from him might be the best thing you can do for him. It could help him persevere in his priesthood, so that he is available to continue to assist others. Count on my prayers.<\/p>\n

Keep learning more with Ask a Priest<\/a><\/h3>\n

Got a question? Need an answer?<\/h3>\n

Today\u2019s secular world throws curve balls at us all the time. AskACatholicPriest is a Q&A feature that anyone can use. Just type in your question or send an email to AskAPriest@rcspiritual.wpenginepowered.com<\/a> and you will get a personal response back from one of our priests at RCSpirituality. You can ask about anything \u2013 liturgy, prayer, moral questions, current events\u2026 Our goal is simply to provide a trustworthy forum for dependable Catholic guidance and information. So go ahead and ask your question\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Q:\u00a0I’m a 19-year-old girl, raised by a single mom and I have two younger siblings. 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He was an assistant publisher of the National Catholic Register and Faith & Family magazine and an editor of the Zenit news agency\u2019s English edition. He has written for\u00a0SpiritualDirection.com\u00a0and\u00a0ePriest. Fr. McIlmail also worked in spiritual retreats in the Northeast, New England, the Midwest, and the South\u00a0and assisted with mission work in Mexico. Born in Philadelphia, he worked in journalism and was active in the pro-life movement before entering the novitiate of the Legion of Christ in 1992. His contributions to RCSpirituality include responding to\u00a0Ask A Priest\u00a0questions and sharing his insights in our\u00a0Weekly Newsletter.","url":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/author\/emcilmail\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/153069","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/362"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=153069"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/153069\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/145952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=153069"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=153069"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=153069"},{"taxonomy":"post_folder","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_folder?post=153069"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}