{"id":145598,"date":"2025-06-10T09:30:00","date_gmt":"2025-06-10T13:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/?p=145598"},"modified":"2024-09-17T11:27:35","modified_gmt":"2024-09-17T15:27:35","slug":"ask-a-priest-what-if-my-teen-didnt-receive-communion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-my-teen-didnt-receive-communion\/","title":{"rendered":"“Ask a Priest: What If My Teen Didn\u2019t Receive Communion?”"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
Q: My 13-year-old daughter is being disrespectful during Mass. She doesn\u2019t follow the Mass, is awkward with others during the rite of peace, and today she decided that she wasn\u2019t going to take Communion because she was tired and didn\u2019t want to walk up to the altar. I didn\u2019t want to make a scene so I left her alone. I did talk to her about her behavior on the way home. My heart breaks because I wish someone would have introduced me to Jesus when I was 13. I want her to love Jesus and the Catholic Church the way I do. Any advice? Did she commit a sin by refusing to take Communion without a valid reason? Thank you so much! \u2013 O.<\/address>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC<\/em><\/p>\n

A:\u00a0It\u2019s good that you called out your daughter on her behavior at Mass.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s important she be held to a certain level of respect. It is the Mass, after all, our highest form of prayer.<\/p>\n

If you insist on proper behavior and hold the line, the lesson will sink in. Your daughter needs your loving guidance and firmness.<\/p>\n

As for Communion: Catholics are required to receive it at least once a year. It\u2019s not necessary for everyone to receive Communion at every Mass.<\/p>\n

In fact, a person who is not in a state of grace should refrain and try to get to confessions as soon as possible.<\/p>\n

But assuming that mortal sin isn\u2019t the problem here, it’s not advisable to force your daughter to receive Communion. You\u00a0don’t want to make it a negative experience for\u00a0her. Nor do you want to intrude too much on what is a very personal decision.<\/p>\n

Her behavior indicates a lack of understanding and\/or appreciation for the Mass. It\u2019s possible that she needs a bit of catechesis to understand what the Eucharistic celebration is all about.<\/p>\n

A few\u00a0suggestions:<\/p>\n

First, intensify your prayers for your daughter. If need be, offer up sacrifices for her, too.<\/p>\n

Second, you might suggest\u00a0that she and you watch a video that explains the Mass and then discuss it. One example is a video from the Diocese of Arlington<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Another, seemingly unrelated suggestion is this: Get involved in some kind of volunteer work with your daughter.<\/p>\n

This could include visiting a shut-in in the neighborhood or collecting items for a pro-life crisis pregnancy center.<\/p>\n

This could give you time together to talk about the faith and bring Gospel charity to those on the margins.<\/p>\n

It could enrich you both. Count on my prayers.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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He was an assistant publisher of the National Catholic Register and Faith & Family magazine and an editor of the Zenit news agency\u2019s English edition. He has written for\u00a0SpiritualDirection.com\u00a0and\u00a0ePriest. Fr. McIlmail also worked in spiritual retreats in the Northeast, New England, the Midwest, and the South\u00a0and assisted with mission work in Mexico. Born in Philadelphia, he worked in journalism and was active in the pro-life movement before entering the novitiate of the Legion of Christ in 1992. His contributions to RCSpirituality include responding to\u00a0Ask A Priest\u00a0questions and sharing his insights in our\u00a0Weekly Newsletter.","url":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/author\/emcilmail\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/145598","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/362"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=145598"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/145598\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/145952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=145598"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=145598"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=145598"},{"taxonomy":"post_folder","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_folder?post=145598"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}