{"id":145587,"date":"2025-04-15T09:30:00","date_gmt":"2025-04-15T13:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/?p=145587"},"modified":"2024-09-17T11:27:53","modified_gmt":"2024-09-17T15:27:53","slug":"ask-a-priest-what-if-a-gay-friend-wants-my-affirmation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/ask-a-priest-what-if-a-gay-friend-wants-my-affirmation\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;Ask a Priest: What If a Gay Friend Wants My Affirmation?&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote>\n<address>Q: A friend of mine is in a homosexual relationship. She&#8217;s Catholic. I believe that homosexuality is a sin and don&#8217;t support it. By not supporting it I mean I never ask about her relationship or talk about it with her. She sensed this and asked for my opinion about her relationship. I said I love her but don&#8217;t support her relationship because it&#8217;s against the religion. I stressed how I still love her for who she is, but I won&#8217;t impose my belief on her since she said it&#8217;s natural and not something to be punished for. However, she was mad, saying that you can&#8217;t love someone without supporting them, and she told me I have no right to discriminate her for the way she lives. Who&#8217;s in the wrong here? What can I do in this case? Can\u2019t I love a person but not support her choices? \u2013 Angie<\/address>\n<\/blockquote>\n<p><em>Answered by Fr. Edward McIlmail, LC<\/em><\/p>\n<p>A:\u00a0It sounds as though you are trying to be as charitable as possible without compromising your beliefs.<\/p>\n<p>From what you say, the problem seems to be with your friend.<\/p>\n<p>You say that she thinks her homosexual relationship is \u201cnatural and not something to be punished for.\u201d If she really believed that, it\u2019s not clear why she needs your affirmation.<\/p>\n<p>Don&#8217;t allow yourself to be manipulated. If your friend can&#8217;t handle your lack of support for her behavior, that is her problem.<\/p>\n<p>She might be trying to stifle her own conscience \u2013 and your refusal to go along is a reminder that something is wrong with her behavior.<\/p>\n<p>None of this is meant to condemn your friend. She is confused about her identity and might be struggling with all kinds of problems.<\/p>\n<p>It would be good to pray for her. But don&#8217;t feel obliged to endorse her lifestyle.<\/p>\n<p>The best thing you can do as a friend is to witness your faith &#8230; and witness to the truth.<\/p>\n<p>Count on my prayers for you and your friend.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Q: A friend of mine is in a homosexual relationship. She&#8217;s Catholic. I believe that homosexuality is a sin and don&#8217;t support it. 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He was an assistant publisher of the National Catholic Register and Faith &amp; Family magazine and an editor of the Zenit news agency\u2019s English edition. He has written for\u00a0SpiritualDirection.com\u00a0and\u00a0ePriest. Fr. McIlmail also worked in spiritual retreats in the Northeast, New England, the Midwest, and the South\u00a0and assisted with mission work in Mexico. Born in Philadelphia, he worked in journalism and was active in the pro-life movement before entering the novitiate of the Legion of Christ in 1992. His contributions to RCSpirituality include responding to\u00a0Ask A Priest\u00a0questions and sharing his insights in our\u00a0Weekly Newsletter.","url":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/author\/emcilmail\/"}]}},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/145587","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/362"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=145587"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/145587\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/145952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=145587"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=145587"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=145587"},{"taxonomy":"post_folder","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.regnumchristi.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/post_folder?post=145587"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}