Dear Stella,<\/p>\n
Now you can see how your patience and virtue have been rewarded!\u00a0 You built up a true friendship with Bill, based on common values and constructed through engaging in worthwhile activities together.\u00a0 You delayed the romance until the friendship was strong, and your dating was directed towards courtship, not entertainment, both of you being reasonably certain that marriage was your calling.\u00a0 And when marriage appeared on the horizon as a possibility in the not-too-distant future, the courtship began.\u00a0 And now you are engaged!\u00a0 My prayers are with you\u2026 But may I also add a small piece of avuncular advice?\u00a0 I draw it from the tragic-glorious experience of today\u2019s saint.<\/p>\n
Godeleva, a noblewomen 18 years of age, married Bertulf, a slightly older Flemish nobleman.\u00a0 But Bertulf\u2019s mother didn\u2019t like the match.\u00a0 She despised it, in fact, and convinced her son to abandon the girl even before the wedding feast had finished.\u00a0 The mother-in-law took it upon herself to persecute the hapless wife.<\/p>\n
First Godeleva was locked in a little cell.\u00a0 Then she was fed only scraps of food, all the while being verbally and psychological abused (physically too, off and on).\u00a0 Finally she managed to escape and return to her father\u2019s house.\u00a0 Her father threatened to turn Bertulf over to the authorities.\u00a0 Bertulf\u2019s father and bishop eventually convinced the reluctant husband to take his wife back and treat her properly.\u00a0 He seemed to repent, and Godeleva gave him another chance.<\/p>\n
But after a little while he returned to his violent ways.\u00a0 Eventually, he had her killed.\u00a0 He left the castle for a trip one night, and two of his lackeys lured Godeleva out of one of the Castle gates, where they fastened a rope around her neck, strangled her, and then threw her into the pond to make it look like a natural death-by-drowning.\u00a0 Everyone knew she had been murdered, but the dastardly deed couldn\u2019t be proven, so her husband got away scot-free.<\/p>\n
You can see why Godeleva is the patron saint of difficult marriages and in-law problems.\u00a0 And that\u2019s what I wanted to mention.\u00a0 Now that you\u2019re engaged, don\u2019t think all your work is over.\u00a0 You need to continue to prepare yourselves, not only staying chaste, not only arranging the wedding details, but continuing to get to know each other, asking the tough questions (how are your other friendships, and his, going to fit into your marriage? What about your respective hobbies and interests? Children?…) about all the important issues, one of which is making sure that you will each be able to get along well with each other\u2019s families.\u00a0 Remember, you don\u2019t live in a fairy tale.\u00a0 In the real world, love is essential for marriage, but so are common sense, responsibility, and prudence.<\/p>\n
Your hopeful uncle,<\/p>\n
Eddy<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Dear Stella, Now you can see how your patience and virtue have been rewarded!\u00a0 You built up a true friendship with Bill, based on common values and constructed through engaging […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":359,"featured_media":145992,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[3719],"tags":[],"post_folder":[],"class_list":["post-142517","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncle-eddy"],"pp_statuses_selecting_workflow":false,"pp_workflow_action":"current","pp_status_selection":"","pp_force_visibility":null,"pp_subpost_visibility":null,"pp_inherited_force_visibility":null,"pp_inherited_subpost_visibility":null,"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n