A Meditation Novena in the Footsteps of St. Thérèse
The experience of not seeing Christ or of feeling distant from Christ can be one that affects all of us. We wonder, ‘why is Jesus keeping his face from me?’ or ‘I feel forgotten!’. These are real sensations that we can experience. It isn’t immediately easy to understand or comprehend what is happening to us or within us. Yet, the Lord allows all for a purpose.
Using stories, Scripture, and St Thérèse of Lisieux’s Story of a Soul, this novena of meditations is meant to strengthen the spiritual muscles of our faith and trust in God’s providence, mercy, and loving friendship.
Introduction
The experience of not seeing Christ or of feeling distant from Christ can be one that affects all of us. We wonder, “why is Jesus keeping his face from me?” or think “I feel forgotten!” These are real sensations that we can experience. It isn’t immediately easy to understand or comprehend what is happening to us or within us. Yet, the Lord allows all for a purpose.
In my 15 years-plus of giving spiritual direction, it has become evident to me that this exact trial of the hidden Lord has given many people the opportunity to grow in true and more mature knowledge and understanding of the Lord so not to be easy prey to the huge swings of feelings, emotions, and sentiments that played havoc with our imagination and sometimes cloud our reason. We live in a society of emotional overload and thus, being aware of this, we need to strengthen our faith in the goodness, love, and mercy of God. He can desire or will nothing evil; thus it is important to mature in our understanding of the workings of our inner life, how we tend to interpret this, and God’s action and relation to us as revealed by Christ and taught by his Church. Only with an ardent and maturing faith in Christ will the eyes of my soul be opened to see past the lies and illusions that are presented to us so convincingly and spontaneously.
In this novena of 9 meditations, I wish to offer you the opportunity to dive into this experience of feeling that Jesus is hiding his face, has forgotten us, is leaving us on our own, or is not giving us consolation. We will approach this concept from different angles with the help of stories, Scripture, and St. Thérèse of Lisieux’s Story of a Soul to better grasp the pedagogy of God the Father who loves us with an eternal love, calls us to a relationship of love with himself, and invites us to surrender our whole person to him in faith and trust enlightened by the power of the Holy Spirit. This novena of meditations is meant to strengthen the spiritual muscles of our faith and trust in God’s Providence, mercy, and loving friendship so as not to panic, despair, recoil in fear, react imprudently, doubt his love, or paint God in an erroneous way as if he was just as flawed as we are in times of desolation, trial, or deep crisis.
I pray that these meditations serve you, inspire you, enlighten you, and whet your appetite for a deeper life of intimacy with Christ in faith, hope, and love, and that through him you experience a true encounter with who God made you to be and, thus, live as fully as possible his most holy plan for your life to the glory of God. The Holy Spirit is the sweet guest of our soul; let us invoke him daily to illuminate our minds, educate our senses, convict us of sin, and lead us into truth.
St. Ignatius of Loyola offers us in the first week of his 30-day spiritual exercises retreat the 14 rules of discernment of spirits (click HERE for a brief and practical explanation by Fr. Timothy Gallagher, OMV). These can serve as a guide to navigate consolations and desolations and the different emotions.
Meditation 1:
Feeling Spiritually Blind
Growing up in Yarmouth, Nova Scotia, Canada I got used to not seeing too far in front of my face! Let me explain. Fog is a very common phenomenon along the coastline of Nova Scotia because of the difference in temperature between the warmer land and the cool North Atlantic Ocean waters. The result when the cool winds from the water blow on land in the spring and summer: pea-soup fog! One loses sight of the beauty of the landscape, the rocky coasts, the colors, the birds, and much more, and what was enjoyed on a rare hot clear day is quickly forgotten, to the point that one starts to think: “What a drab place!” when the opposite is true. My mother once commented that her first summer living there she couldn’t believe how many days of fog there were and how happy she was when finally the sun would burst through to burn it off even if for a short time!
In the spiritual life, this can happen to us. God seems distant, unnoticed, and absent, and all we notice is the negative around us in the imperfections of creation and humanity. Our woundedness, an effect of original sin, stands out all too clearly when we lose sight of God’s presence.
St. Thérèse of Lisieux offers us some simple but in-depth wisdom regarding the truth of things when outside factors try to tell us differently. Ponder these words that show us how to see past illusions and falsehoods and with simplicity see the glories of God at work:
“It seems to me that if a little flower could speak, it would tell simply what God has done for it without trying to hide its blessings. It would not say, under the pretext of a false humility, it is not beautiful or without perfume, that the sun has taken away its splendor and the storm has broken its stem when it knows that all this is untrue. The flower about to tell her story rejoices at having to publish the totally gratuitous gifts of Jesus. She knows that nothing in herself as capable of attracting the divine glances, and his mercy alone brought about everything that is good in her.”1
Scripture passage for reflection: Luke 18:35-43
The blind man developed his other senses to an alarming degree. It was for survival! He couldn’t see Jesus, but he could hear him, hear the commotion made by others regarding him, and reason in his mind what this person could be like to deal with. To this end, he concluded that he should have more intimate contact with this Jesus. Thus, upon hearing that he was walking close by, he yelled out: “Son of David, have pity on me!” God made human beings very adaptable! We can amazingly deal with very adverse limitations and still overcome them! This blind man turned his amazement and wonder into a cry for help. Do I use all that the Lord has given me even in my limited way to seek him who will have pity on me? Write down any moments I remember doing this.
He is told to be quiet, mind his manners, and not to bother Jesus. The world wants us to wallow in our limitations, in self-pity, and in what we don’t have, making us feel guilty for not having it all together, guilty for something that isn’t our fault, and guilty for not being perfect, and thus far from and not good enough for God. All these are lies! Do I see lies that have crept or are creeping into my life, into my way of looking at myself and relating to God and the world? What are they? Call them by name!
“What do you want me to do for you?” “Lord, please let me see.” This is the key to overcoming the lies: a humble, faith-filled plea for clarity of sight! It is a plea that is saying: “I want to see your face, Lord! I want to gaze into the mystery of your eyes and see the depths of love you have for me, who is your child! I want to see the beauty of the truth of who I am according to you who created me, not according to the lies of the enemy of my soul and the world!” Christ generously wants to give us all this and more. What is it that I am asking from Christ? Write it down.
Colloquy: Jesus, you alone can make the blind see again and you alone can give me sight to see the beauty and truth of who you are and who I am in you who created me, loved me, and gave up your life for me so that I might have eternal life. Take away my blindness because of sin, because of the lies I’ve believed, and allow me to faithfully follow you as your disciple. Amen.
1 All quotes for St. Thérèse of Lisieux are taken from THE STORY OF A SOUL: The Autobiography of Saint Thérèse of Lisieux, 3rd Ed., Translated from the Original Manuscripts by John Clarke, OCD, ICS Publications, Washington, DC, 1996.
Meditation 2:
Where are you, Jesus, in this storm?
When I was 5 years old while still living in Yarmouth, we experienced a terrible windstorm on Groundhog Day or, for us Catholics, the Presentation of Jesus in the Temple! It struck abruptly one afternoon coupled with freezing rain and I remember my mother taking us one by one from the mall to the car so that we wouldn’t fall down or get blown away! Dad was away for an undercover police investigation that week. At home, the windstorm never let up with winds gusting to 160 km/h (100 mph). It was dark and scary, and the living room window looked like it was bending under the pressure and might explode. The power was out; we were all scared; we missed Dad.
Life can be like this, we can feel scared, confused, alone, and distant from God. Where are you, Lord, in all of this? Have you turned your face from me? Maybe the Little Flower might be able to shed light on this as she recounts her storm regarding her vocation.
St. Thérèse of Lisieux, the Little Flower, wrote the following about her profession of vows on September 8, 1890:
“The beautiful day of my wedding finally arrived. It was without a single cloud; however, the preceding evening a storm arose within my soul the like of which I’d never seen before. Not a single doubt concerning my vocation had ever entered my mind until then, and it evidently was necessary that I experience this trial. In the evening, while making the Way of the Cross after Matins, my vocation appeared to me as a dream, a chimera. I found life in Carmel to be very beautiful, but the devil inspired me with the assurance that it wasn’t for me and that I was misleading my Superiors by advancing on this way to which I wasn’t called. The darkness was so great that I could see and understand one thing only: I didn’t have a vocation. Ah! how can I possibly describe the anguish in my soul? It appeared to me (and this is an absurdity which shows it was a temptation from the devil) that if I were to tell my Novice Mistress about these fears, she would prevent me from pronouncing my Vows. And still I wanted to do God’s will and return to the world rather than remain in Carmel and do my own will. I made the Mistress come out of the choir and, filled with confusion, I told her the state of my soul. Fortunately, she saw things much clearer than I did, and she completely reassured me. The act of humility I had just performed put the devil to flight since he had perhaps thought that I would not dare admit my temptation. My doubts left me completely as soon as I finished speaking…”
Scripture passage for reflection: John 20:11-18 (Jesus appears to Mary Magdalene)
Mary Magdalene weeps not knowing where Jesus is. She thinks she needs him physically like before and she still thinks he is dead. She doesn’t realize he is alive. Her life was upside down and all seemed lost. Have I ever noticed in my life that I am looking for Christ in the wrong way or in the wrong place? How often we look for him outside ourselves when the place to begin is within our hearts!
Jesus is always with us. Mary Magdalene is overjoyed to hear her name said by Jesus and her whole demeanor changes. St. Thérèse had a struggle and a temptation to doubt her calling yet going to her novice mistress and her Mother Superior, both Christ’s representatives to her, totally smoothed things over once she verbalized the storm inside. Do I make sure to speak about the storms inside my heart promptly with God’s representative(s) for me with faith and trust?
When we make the storm known to God’s representatives, we disarm the devil and gain peace and joy. With gratitude, reflect on some personal examples.
Colloquy: Lord, the storms of life come very often out of nowhere and strike me. Often, I feel caught off guard, but I know that you are with me to guide me even though it is at times hard to see during the storm and I feel alone or fearful. I know that if I keep my eyes and heart centered on you and build our relationship on solid rock, no matter what storm comes my way, I will not lose sight of you or be deceived by the devil. Amen.
Meditation 3:
Jesus, Hidden from our Eyes
“St. Paul says that Christ is being brought to fulfillment in his Church and that all of us contribute to this fulfillment, and thus he achieves the fullness of life, that is, the mystical stature that he has in his mystical body, which will reach completion only on judgment day. In another place, Paul says: I complete in my own flesh what is lacking in the sufferings of Christ. This is the plan by which the Son of God completes and fulfills in us all the various stages and mysteries. He desires us to perfect the mystery of his Incarnation and birth by forming himself in us and being reborn in our souls through the blessed sacraments of Baptism and the Eucharist. He fulfills his hidden life in us, hidden with him in God.”
(Excerpt from the treatise of St. John Eudes on the Kingdom of Jesus: The mystery of Christ in us and in the Church)
There is something very powerful about assisting at the sacrament of Baptism and worshiping at Holy Mass or adoration. Why? We see many gestures, solemn acts, and words performed but with the naked eye, Jesus remains hidden from the physical sight. Faith is required to bring it alive. God in his wisdom works behind the scenes in the depths of our being where often we don’t always take time to really examine and heal. He awaits his moment and then all his power comes forth in the transformation of our lives in key moments when we are properly disposed to accept and receive it.
Scripture passage for reflection: Matthew 8:23-27 (Jesus asleep in the boat)
We don’t often feel anything, see anything, or sometimes even think Jesus is very interested in us even when we are praying or celebrating the sacraments. These human emotions can sometimes plague us and we are tempted to cry out to the sleeping Lord: “Don’t you care… Save us?” Do I find myself sometimes getting desperate when it seems like I’m not getting “anything out of it”? How can I properly channel this emotion based on the Scripture passage?
St. Thérèse of Lisieux wrote about her profession of vows: “I should have spoken to you about the retreat preceding my Profession, dear Mother, before speaking about the trial I have mentioned; it was far from bringing me any consolations since the most absolute aridity and almost total abandonment were my lot. Jesus was asleep as usual in my little boat; ah! I see very well how rarely souls allow him to sleep peacefully within them. Jesus is so fatigued with always having to take the initiative and to attend to others that he hastens to take advantage of the repose I offer to him. He will undoubtedly awaken before my great eternal retreat, but instead of being troubled about it this only gives me extreme pleasure.”
What do you see in Thérèse’s attitude and disposition of soul? She says to her Mother Superior that she feels no consolations, that Jesus sleeps most of the time in her, but that she isn’t troubled by this. What is allowing her to see past the lack of consolations and be pleased to simply have Jesus choose to rest in her? What kind of love is she demonstrating that is very profound? What is God saying to me?
Thérèse has hope and trust in the Lord and that prevents her from self-pity. How can I grow in hope and trust? Do I sometimes misread Jesus’ apparent sleeping inside me? How can I spiritually and emotionally mature so as to read these experiences correctly and calmly?
Colloquy: Jesus, increase in my heart faith, hope, and love, especially in the sacraments. Keep my spirits calm so as not to panic in the face of spiritual darkness. Enable me to understand your pedagogy with me to mature in my knowledge and adherence to your most Divine Will and the work you wish to accomplish in and through me. Amen.
Meditation 4:
Not Feeling Overly Noticed
Recounting her special trip to Rome on pilgrimage to see Pope Leo XIII, St. Thérèse of Lisieux, having for some time promised Jesus to be his little plaything in the form of a little ball to do with as he will, wrote: “At Rome, Jesus pierced his little plaything; he wanted to see what there was inside it and having seen, content with his discovery, He let his little ball fall to the ground and he went off to sleep. What did he do during his gentle sleep and what became of the little abandoned ball? Jesus dreamed he was still playing with his toy, leaving it and taking it up in turns, and then having seen it roll quite far he pressed it to his heart, no longer allowing it to ever go far from his little hand.”
She had just made her petition to Pope Leo XIII to enter Carmel at 15 years old and he didn’t say a definitive “yes” which left her suffering emotionally though she said she was at peace within, and confident things would work out since the Pontiff’s answer seemed favorable to her desire, though not directly. Thus, she writes about this attitude of hers toward Jesus having her as his little plaything. This helps her to remember her smallness, insignificance, and poverty, being totally dependent on God and totally open to his will for her life. Jesus doesn’t forget us!
Perhaps in our own life, we have felt forgotten or unheard at work, by a spouse, or a friend–even God–and it hurts. We aren’t alone, and the Lord who lived these sensations will help us.
Scripture passages for reflection: John 1:10-14 & Luke 2:1-7 (birth of Jesus)
Look at Our Lord Jesus coming into the world as a child and not being received except by Mary and Joseph and a few others. The author of life, the light of the world, the great I AM in the flesh, comes into our midst and he is not received to the point of there being no room in the inn for him to be born. He comes in poverty! What emotions, thoughts, reactions does this evoke in my soul? How does this speak to my heart regarding the fact that as a child of God, I am called to the same standards as Jesus: persecution, cross, and disregard?
How is this similar to the disposition of God himself who offers himself to us as our Savior knowing that not all would accept or believe in him? Now reflect on St. Thérèse offering herself as a little plaything (a little ball) to Jesus. In her own simple yet profound way, she is offering herself as a sacrifice to the Lord to please him, to respond affirmatively to her acceptance and belief in him. What is in my heart?
What virtue do I see St. Thérèse hinting at in the way she expresses Jesus taking up the little ball again? Often in the sacraments, we receive special acts of love in the moments we least expect it and are most ready to receive it. Jesus wants us to know we are loved and that he will always protect us even if it seems we’re abandoned for a time.
Colloquy: Jesus, you call me to follow you even though you remain hidden at times. You call me to follow in love, in faith, and in trust in a way that my whole person is caught up in you and not in making my identity be based upon being noticed or appreciated in and by the world. The logic of your divine love is not in appearances but goes to the deepest part of my heart calling me to renounce myself to be yours alone. Grant me this grace to abandon myself completely to your will. Amen.
Meditation 5:
The Uphill Battles of Life
In early July 2021, I had the pleasure of vacationing with some of my priestly brothers in the Valley of Formazza in the Northwest corner of Italy near the Switzerland border. On a most beautiful day with no clouds and a light breeze, a priest and I decided to climb Mt. Blinnenhorn (3400m) where there was an altar and cross. The challenge: fresh snow for over half the walk with no path. So, we trail blazed. We started at 1750 meters and I wasn’t sure how my breathing would be as we got higher up. I hadn’t hiked at that elevation in years. Yet, I trusted the other priest, an experienced winter hiker, and little by little we advanced. At one point when it was quite steep and we were seemingly not advancing, I stopped a moment to rest, feeling alone and vulnerable, and asked myself: “What am I doing up here? This is crazy!” But I quickly realized that there was little road left to travel and I didn’t feel overly tired, just a bit nervous from the heights and the unknown. So, after a short prayer, I refocused and put my trust in Christ and my guide who hadn’t disappointed. I made it happily to the top–soaking in the beauty of the peaks–as the recently developed clouds broke open to reveal God’s amazing creation. I knew I still had to climb down, but I was so happy to have stuck with it. It was such a gift!
The Christian spiritual life is like this in some ways. It is an exciting prospect of adventure that draws us in, but at times it gets scary out there—tough, challenging, ruthless, tiring for our weak wills, and lonely. Though we are motivated and fixed on the goal of Heaven knowing the Lord is our trustworthy guide, we still must be aware that there are obstacles and the evil one who seeks to discourage us. We need to regularly refocus (spiritual direction, confession, prayer, Eucharist, retreat) and continue with renewed trust in the promises of Christ. He sustains us with the “food” we need to continue onwards in his will.
Scripture passages for reflection: Matthew 1:18-25 & Galatians 5:22-23
St. Thérèse of Lisieux speaking of her weaknesses and her Profession retreat wrote: “Really, I am far from being a saint, and what I have just said is proof of this; instead of rejoicing, for example, at my aridity, I should attribute it to my little fervor and lack of fidelity; I should be desolate for having slept (for seven years) during my hours of prayer and my thanksgiving after Holy Communion; well, I am not desolate. I remember that little children are as pleasing to their parents when they are asleep as well as when they are wide awake; I remember, too, that when they perform operations, doctors put their patients to sleep. Finally, I remember that: ‘The Lord knows our weaknesses, that he is mindful that we are but dust and ashes (Ps 102:14)…. I have frequently noticed that Jesus doesn’t want me to lay up provisions; He nourishes me at each moment with a totally new food; I find it within me without my knowing how it is there. I believe it is Jesus himself hidden in the depths of my poor little heart; He is giving me the grace of acting within me, making me think of all he desires me to do at the present moment.”
In our Gospel passage, St. Joseph loved Mary but was faced with a very important decision. What disposition of soul is communicated in this passage? How does this affect his relationship with God and following the sudden revelation of his will?
St. Thérèse teaches us a valuable lesson about trust. She isn’t caught up in perfectionism but is very conscious of her imperfections. She knows the profound love God has for her. What do I see in this passage? How do I relate or how can I learn from her experience in how I see my dependency on God, his grace, and his will?
What is my “Go-To” to discover God’s will and be fed with the necessary grace? What fruits of the Holy Spirit are present to help me know these are the right “Go-To” items or actions for me?
Colloquy: Lord, I want to follow you wherever you lead me. I am weak, I often stumble but I believe you will sustain me, feed me, enlighten and strengthen me for life’s challenges. Help me to trust in your grace at work in me. Enable me to find my rest in being your child who is loved for who I am and not for what I do. Amen.
Meditation 6:
A Child is Born Unto Us
The birth of a child brings great joy! It is a celebration of love and life! The beauty of a child coming into the world should invoke in us a celebratory or festive spirit. Life is a gift; a powerful gift! We need to cherish all stages of life! We have lost the sense of the sanctity of life. We live in a near godless society of radical individualism that reduces things to the whims of the individual at the expense of others and to the detriment of both the common good and natural law. We have much to pray for!
In the time of Jesus, the mighty Roman Empire ruled as a totalitarian regime, and life was not always regarded with kindness. There was no festive celebration at Jesus’ arrival! In fact, those who came to acknowledge him as Messiah and Savior were the poor and the foreigners! When King Herod heard of the new king of the Jews, he felt threatened and tried to eliminate him. The Lord came in the most hidden way: a little innocent baby! All he had were Mary and Joseph!
Committed and convinced Christian believers savor Christ’s coming as a helpless infant because it teaches us a valuable lesson about how Christ longs to be born in the hearts of men and women—not imposed! This is fundamental because Christ came to show us a way to the Father that demands faith in him, a radical transformation of life in trust and surrender, and an openness to experiencing his love and forgiveness. What better way than as an infant to call the first believers to himself and truly trust in God’s plan of salvation?
St. Thérèse of Lisieux writing about her reception of the veil which took place 16 days after her profession of vows admitted to the following emotions: “(T)he day was filled with tears. Papa was not there to bless his Queen; Father Pichon was in Canada; the Bishop, who was supposed to come and dine with Uncle, did not come at all since he was sick. In a word, everything was sadness and bitterness. And still peace, always peace, reigned at the bottom of the chalice. That day, too, Jesus permitted that I was unable to hold back my tears and these were misunderstood.”
Scripture passage for reflection: Luke 9: 46-48 (greatest in the Kingdom)
Christ teaches us a valuable lesson about the type of disposition of heart we are to have to enter his Kingdom: a humble servant’s heart! When I read this passage from St. Luke and reflect on Jesus’ humble birth, what does it invoke within me? What positive and negative emotions do I experience? How does this help me better understand Christ, his plan for humanity, and his mysterious mission of salvation?
St. Thérèse writes that though she suffered because of important people in her life being absent from her ceremony, she still had interior peace. Can I relate? Why or why not? Does this experience of Thérèse help me to better understand my own journey of faith?
When I pray on these points, how do I think the Lord is inviting me to deepen my faith in him regarding the type of humble, servile, and surrendered heart he is looking for in his followers so that I don’t panic, lose peace or falter in the Christian life? How is he helping me by the gift of a deeper faith to still see him present in my life especially when he seems very hidden?
Colloquy: Jesus, I am so thankful for the gift of faith that allows me to see your presence even though at times it is very hidden because of your great humility. Teach me to put aside my rationalism, desire to control, and my pride to humbly see with eyes of profound faith! Amen.
Meditation 7:
When God’s Plan is Unclear
In his autobiography “Boat Priest”, Fr. Chan Dinh of the Legionaries of Christ tells his story of escape, survival, and vocation that began at 8 years old when he with some siblings escaped Vietnam on a small boat with 20 people. His mother had arranged it all in secret with his older brother who owned the boat. His mother escaped only later. Life was difficult under Communist rule and his mother wanted the children to have a better life though there were many risks involved. Chan and his brother closest to him in age went at night with relatives who were also escaping and took canoes out to the boat operated by his older brother. Even at 8 years old, he realized the danger and the uncertainty, and the fear of getting caught or dying at sea was with them all. As he reflected on it later, God was in charge but his plan wasn’t so clear. He had to trust in his brother to hopefully pilot them to safety (3 days at sea in terrible conditions and getting looted by pirates when they landed in Thailand). Not everything is blueprinted to perfection! In fact, in this life nothing is! God desires us to truly trust in his Providence and wait on him. After many months in refugee camps (Thailand and the Philippines) his family all made it to the USA sponsored by other siblings already there. Thus, all his siblings were reunited with his mother too.
How often in life, maybe not in as dramatic a fashion, do we find God’s will unclear for us. It seems hidden from our eyes but Our Lord doesn’t play tricks on us. He calls us to have faith in his goodness, mercy, and providence. He invites us to surrender our wills to him and let him lead us, equipping us in the proper moment with his grace and the necessary strength. We want control over all our circumstances, and the Lord is asking us to relinquish it and let him lead us. Doing so frees us immensely!
St. Thérèse of Lisieux writing about her special vocation within the Carmel in Chapter 9 writes in a way that I believe shows not only the simplicity of her faith and her total openness with the Lord, but also her total confidence to receive from him all that she asks. Though things aren’t immediately obvious to her, she persevered in prayer and readily received what Christ so affectionately desired to give to her. She writes: “O my Jesus! What is your answer to all my follies? Is there a soul more little, more powerless than mine? Nevertheless, even because of my weakness, it has pleased you, O Lord, to grant my little childish desires and you desire, today, to grant other desires that are greater than the universe.”
Scripture passage for reflection: Matthew 2:13-23
Joseph upon receiving the message from the angel took Mary and Jesus. They left everything behind and began their escape to Egypt, which wasn’t a short journey. Joseph and Mary needed to trust in the Providence of God to protect them from being stopped by the Romans and attacked by robbers, and to help them find the necessary water and food along the way. It was dangerous but necessary. How does this Gospel resonate within when I think about it?
St. Thérèse speaks to God with great confidence, childlike faith, and total abandonment. What way do I speak to the Lord? Do I share in any of her dispositions? How can I grow in my trust and childlike faith?
So often in life, much will be hidden from my eyes and revealed only in the last moment. How can I foster an attitude of readiness, faith, trust, and serenity in the face of uncertainty like Mary and Joseph or Fr. Chan faced? What might be holding me back? Bring these things to God in prayer.
Colloquy: Lord, I get scared sometimes and don’t really understand your plan for me. I sincerely want to understand because I believe you have lovingly traced it out for me to discover and embrace with greater clarity, confidence, and love. I surrender my will to you and I ask you to unveil the eyes of my heart to see with faith and trust in all the little signs you give me that are visible only to the pure of heart and poor in spirit! Amen.
Note: If you are interested in a copy of Fr Chan Dinh’s autobiography in either English or Portuguese, please contact Fr. Chan directly at [email protected]. He is asking only for a donation that goes to support the Legionary of Christ-directed multi-diocesan Major Seminary Mater Ecclesiae in Brazil where he carries out his ministry.
Meditation 8:
Behold, I Stand at the Door and Knock
In a recent homily, Fr. Jim shared a story about a priest friend who had been a formator for seminarians at a major seminary spanning over 8 years. He said it was a challenging mission because his friend spent much of his day in his office attending the seminarians to answer their daily questions, help with practical needs and speak about their personal and community seminary formation program. It was mentally and spiritually draining at times, and thus the temptation to perhaps trivialize these needs and discussions could easily have crept in! It so happened that last summer this friend got reassigned to a new mission elsewhere. When Fr. Jim visited the major seminary, he was given his friend’s old office. As he sat at the desk pondering things, something above the office doorway caught his eye. It was a verse from the Book of Revelation 3:20 that read: “Behold, I stand at the door and knock.” Fr. Jim now understood how his friend was able to maintain his supernatural focus in dealing with seminarians day in and day out for those 8 years. He discovered and served Jesus in each of them, seeing that his contribution to their preparation was key to their priestly life as a whole!
How easy it is in life to trivialize things and lose focus! How easy it is to even lose sight of the spiritual realities and fall into routine and boredom! If we don’t foster a supernatural spirit and outlook as Fr. Jim’s friend did, we run the risk of losing sight of Jesus who presents himself to us in others in a variety of ways. How important it is to remember the words of Jesus: when you did it to the least of these, you did it to me!
Scripture passages for reflection: Matthew 25:40-45 and Revelation 3:20
Jesus identifies himself with each one of us. The mystery of the Incarnation allows Our Lord to relate to us through the sharing of our human nature. Jesus came to save us body and soul and he wants us to see him in each other. How do I understand this and how do I live this? Can I live it more intentionally? How?
St. Thérèse had an experience in the convent with a sister with whom she was assigned to cleaning cloths and who was very rough and messy She recounts it in this way: “Another time, I was in the laundry doing the washing in front of a Sister who was throwing dirty water into my face every time she lifted the handkerchiefs to her bench; my first reaction was to draw back and wipe my face to show the Sister who was sprinkling me that she would do me a favor to be more careful. But I immediately thought I would be very foolish to refuse these treasures which were being given to me so generously, and I took care not to show my struggle.”
We see how supernatural St. Thérèse is as she realizes that the Lord is offering her a treasure of graces through suffering in a mysterious and hidden way. In my life, do I discover Christ present in sufferings and inconveniences? How can I foster a more supernatural spirit in dealing with trials?
Often in our lives, Jesus comes to us in a hidden way, a way that even seems annoying initially, and we have a choice to make. As Christians, the Lord is calling us to transform our way of seeing things in our life: people we meet or know that rub us the wrong way, family friction and disagreements, inconveniences, career or financial setbacks, and times of dryness in prayer. Examine your disposition in the face of adversity. What calls you to supernatural faith and charity? Write down your challenges and how the Lord is inviting you to grow.
Colloquy: Most Loving Jesus, you allow me to experience many things in my life even great inconveniences and sufferings. Nothing happens without you allowing it and you never leave me orphaned. I sincerely believe that! Help me Lord to transform all situations into opportunities of grace to be transformed in heart and mind, to be more like you in living your life among us, and faithfully and lovingly embracing the will of the Father! Amen.
Meditation 9:
There is No Christ without the Cross
The cross is perhaps the last place instinctively we would think of looking for Christ, but when St. Francis of Assisi was praying and seeking the will of God he prayed before the St. Damian cross, and Christ spoke to his heart telling him: Rebuild my church! But St. Francis also understood that his life needed to be like that of Christ who embraced the cross as his greatest act of love to the Father and for our salvation. Christ transformed what was regarded as evil–death by Roman crucifixion–and changed it into the only way to gain eternal life. The cross in our life is not to be rejected and avoided but transformed in the love of Christ! St. Francis radically lived the Gospel and embraced the cross as his friend, accepting total poverty and dependence on God over the wealth he was born into. He made his life a living witness to his love and imitation of Christ, even to the point that the Lord gifted him with the five wounds of Christ. St. Thérèse of Lisieux also shows us the importance of the cross in discovering Jesus!
To Live of Love (a poem by St. Thérèse of Lisieux)
3. To live of love, ’tis by Thy life to live,
O glorious King, my chosen, sole Delight!
Hid in the Host, how often Thou dost give
Thyself to those who seek Thy radiant light.
Then hid shall be my life, unmarked, unknown,
That I may have Thee heart to heart with me;
4. For loving souls desire to be alone, With love, and Thee!
To live of love, ’tis not to fix one’s tent On Tabor’s height
and there with Thee remain.
Tis to climb Calvary with strength nigh spent,
And count Thy heavy cross our truest gain.
In heaven, my life a life of joy shall be,
The heavy cross shall then be gone for aye.
Here upon earth, in suffering with Thee, Love! let me stay.
Scripture passages for reflection: Galatians 6:14-17 (Our boast is in the cross of Christ) & 1 Corinthians 1:18-25
St. Paul’s boast in Galatians is in the cross of Christ, dying to the world and becoming a new creation by baptism. In Baptism we die with Christ in the waters and rise to new life in his Resurrection. If Christ is my reward, then I will find him on the cross! Reflect on this reality of becoming a new creation by means of the cross and how you die with Christ on the cross to rise with him. What do the words “Peace and mercy” invoke in you by contemplating the cross?
In 1 Corinthians 1, St. Paul speaks about the foolishness of the cross to the mindset of the world. When our minds are darkened to God, the cross becomes a thing of folly and a stumbling block. Our pride makes it impossible to see how God in the flesh could allow himself to suffer such a thing and appear so weak and defeated. His divinity appears hidden to the world, and thus they say, “see he was just a crazy man.” But the Resurrection says otherwise. His redemptive suffering changes everything, and the world’s wisdom is exposed for its hopelessness and emptiness. Do I see that faith in Christ and his word is the only way to make sense of the cross and understand its relation to my own life? Take a crucifix in your hands and embrace it, kiss it, and speak with Our Lord asking him for the grace to nail your selfishness, egotism, sensuality, and vanity to the cross with him in love so as to find new life in the risen Christ. We must realize that our life here on earth is meant to be lived united to the cross of Christ and in his spirit, risen with him in the grace of being children of God!
St. Thérèse in stanzas 3 and 4 of her poem “To Live of Love” speaks of the connection between love and carrying the cross on earth. If suffering by carrying the cross means being with Christ, then she wants to be there with him, her Love! Where has this love and strength come from? She speaks of the Host (Eucharist) and being of one heart. Is there a connection between this oneness and the ability to see the value of carrying a heavy cross in this life with Christ? How is Christ asking me to carry my cross or crosses? Remember, I am never alone though it can seem like it. Our hope is always on the goal: Heaven and eternal life in Christ.
Colloquy: Crucified and Risen Jesus, I come before you in my littleness, poverty, and needy state imploring you to teach me to love, to give of myself generously and selflessly, to abandon myself fully to the Divine Will of the Father, to open my eyes to see you at work in my life and the lives of others so that I may bear witness to your presence, friendship, unity, and beauty! Amen.
Meet Fr. Todd Arsenault, LC
Fr Todd Arsenault, originally from Prince Edward Island, Canada, is from a family of five having two younger sisters. At 23 years of age, he joined the Legion of Christ in Cheshire, Connecticut in July 1994, did his seminary formation in the USA & Canada, and finally in Rome, Italy, where he was ordained to the priesthood December 24, 2005, by Norberto Cardinal Rivera, Archbishop Emeritus of Mexico City, at the chapel of the Legionaries of Christ International College.
From 2006-2009, he ministered in the Greater Toronto Area (GTA), Canada, and in Syracuse, New York, with the groups of men and young men in Regnum Christi (RC) and from 2010-2020 served full-time in the GTA assisting the RC men’s and women’s sections, offering spiritual direction, preaching retreats, young adult ministry, couple formation groups and occasionally, ministry in parishes. Since September 2020, Fr Todd has been in the Community of Priest Students in Rome studying a two-year licentiate degree in Spiritual Theology. He will graduate in June 2022.
